Ok, I’ll admit it. Mother’s Day freaked me out. A LOT. And I’m not even going to share what I wrote in my journal that day because I’ve cooled off since then and I don’t want to come off sounding like a selfish jerkwad having a pity-party. That and a whole lot of other reasons, but that one was at the top of the list. ;)
But what I will say is this:
My time for being a mother will come. Just not right now.
And just because I’ve given birth to a baby doesn’t mean I should automatically include myself in the “mother club.” I haven’t been there to change the poopy diapers ‘round the clock. I didn’t struggle with a weepy child in the middle of the night because he had an upset tummy or gas. I won’t be there to comfort him when he’s sad or scared, and I won’t be there to discipline him when he’s being naughty.
For all the mothers out there who’ve had to put up with all the crap that goes with being a parent, I just want to say that I appreciate you. And you deserve all the wonderful things that come in exchange for all the yucky stuff you have to deal with. You deserve the spontaneous hugs and the drooly smiles. You deserve the giggles of delight and belly-aching laughter. You deserve the “I love you mommy’s” and the absolute trust that child gives you. You deserve the sleeping baby in your arms that you've devoted your lives to.
And he deserves you, too.
Yes, my time will come. But not right now.